| Lesson Three What was your abortion experience like? Who am I still angry with? This is the story of my experience and my anger. I went to my family doctor; he told me that it was only a blob. “It will be so much safer if you just abort.” I was smarter than the doctors. My response to the doctor, “I think we are talking about a baby here.” Keep in mind that this was thirty-nine years ago, in the era of abortions which had just become legal. We really haven’t become any smarter; we continue to sell the same bill of goods to woman in spite of the fact that we now have three dimensional ultra sounds. I was told it is the Quick Fix. “No one will know. What will people say?” Well, I submitted one time to my parent’s wishes, when I believe I should have fought. I was taken to an abortion clinic in Washington, DC by my dad. It was dirty and looked like a motel with rooms….not what you thought a medical facility would look like. They made sure that I left with contraception as they kept saying to me “We don’t want to see you back here again.” Trust me I didn’t want to come back there again! I am here to tell you it wasn’t a Quick Fix. The moment the abortion was done, part of my heart was torn apart with that baby’s departure. I cried for days, weeks, years, and suffered with depressed. I was suicidal. If this was such a Quick Fix, why did it hurt so much inside? I suffered with my self-image. High school was not fun for me. I just wanted to finish school and move on with my life. I suffered for eleven years with anger, bitterness, and unforgiveness toward my dad, who took me, and myself, the hardest person to forgive. One thing my dad did say that still sticks: “If you wouldn’t have signed, they wouldn’t have done it. That was after the abortion. Trust me, if he said that before, well I wouldn’t be writing this testimony. I WAS FIFTEEN!!!! I could sign for my own abortion I didn’t need a parent. How sad. I wore the plastic face on the outside and was dying on the inside. How we can do this so well even in our churches! I was angry at my dad, myself, my boyfriend, and the doctors. So what was your story? Take the time to write it down and get it out. Feel free to email me your story if you’d like. If your heart has bitterness; it cannot be hidden or denied. It should be addressed. God’s Word says that you should get dispose of it. One way that helps to dispose of it, is by bringing it out of the darkness and into the light. Here are some common targets that women, who have gone through an abortion may have. Underline the ones that feel real to you. • Those who withheld the truth about abortion. • Those who presented abortion as the best choice. • Yourself for allowing the unplanned pregnancy. • The father of the baby for not being there physically and emotionally or financially • Parents for pressuring you to have the abortion. • Yourself for not being strong enough to choose life for your baby. • God for allowing you to get pregnant and for not stopping the abortion. As you go to a quiet place, ask God to show you any areas of bitterness left from the abortion. Dear God, I am angry with ______(names)______________ for ___________________________ names__________________ hurting me when ________________________________. In Jesus’ Name, Amen Here was my prayer, so you can see we all have anger and need to deal with bitterness. Dear God, I am angry with my dad and the doctors for taking me, pressuring me, and lying to me which includes my dad and the doctors who hurt me; they lied and pressured me, They didn’t honor me or the baby. I also am angry at the father for allowing all this to happen. I was only 15 years old. The next step in disposing the bitterness is to forgive which will be addressed in the next lesson. Forgiveness is not easy, but so freeing for you. Please feel free to email me. I’d love to hear how this lesson helped you. Blessings, Margie |
Elisha's Home and Ministries
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