Do I Need Healing?
So glad you can join us on our first lesson of your healing process. I
wish I could tell you there is a magic wand that will wipe away all your
pain; but, I do know if you take the time to complete these lessons you
will experience a healing power like you’ve never experienced before.
This may be difficult for you, but the process will be so freeing. There
will be nine lessons for you to read through. I will share my experience
with my abortion through the whole process. Keep in mind, one out of
four women have had an abortion, so you are not alone in this process.
Letting the secret out, can be the beginning of the healing process for
most, since abortion seems like a good secret to be kept. Many women,
who have gone through an abortion, have not spoken to anyone about
this. The enemy loves to control us to keep our secret. Why without
sharing this secret with anyone, Satan can continue to beat you down
and keep you from growing in Jesus Christ. Sharing your secret out,
can be so freeing.
What is so ironic is that everyone told me that abortion would be the
quick fix….a done deal; no one would ever know! Well imagine, I had not
told anyone and I had my first son. The nurse in the hospital called me
to update my information; I told her, “This is my first child.”
She proceeded to tell me, “I see you have had an abortion.”
I wanted to yell, scream, and shout. I thought this was my secret. No one
was supposed to know; and, you have it on my records. Quick fix! I don’
t think! So why did I have all these feelings, if it was really a quick fix?
Do you need to continue your healing process?
Take time to ponder upon these questions:
3. Do you avoid media that contains information on abortions?
4. Are you affected by physical reminders of your abortion, babies,
pregnant woman, baby clothes, or children?
5. Do certain times of the year trigger you with depression or sickness
such as the anniversary date of the abortion or the child’s expected
6. Does resentment or unforgiveness plague you towards anyone with
their involvement with your abortion: parents, boyfriend, the abortionist,
friends, or husband?
7. Did your attitude toward relationships change after your abortion?
Did you avoid relationships, or have difficulty with intimacy?
9. Have you rationalized why life is better without the child in your life
10. Has substance abuse plagued you or increased?
11. Has depression or suicidal thoughts plagued you?
12. Have you experienced hallucinations, flashbacks, or nightmares, or
heard a baby’s cry - relating to the abortion?
13. Has emptiness, a deep sense of loss plagued your soul?
14. Does sorrow, anger, and guilt overcome you, when you talk about
15. Are you compelled to tell about your abortion or conceal it from
16. Are you driven to succeed in your career or education? Or do you
strive to make your relationship successful to prove the abortion was
the right choice?
17. Do you have a difficult time bonding with your children, or do you
smother them with love and over protect them?
18. If you are childless, do you fear that you will never have children?
19. Did you stop growing emotionally after your abortion or begin
repeating harmful patterns?
20. Are you punishing yourself or denying yourself? Does an eating
disorder plague you?
21. Is life in sections, before the abortion, or after the abortion? Has
your self-esteem changed?
22. Is death and dying a preoccupation?
23. Did your relationship with or concept of God change after your
abortion? Did it bring you closer, or are you more distant from God?
24. Are your abortion memories more painful than the actual
While answering these questions, you may find other areas of your life
that have been affected by your abortion. Take time to write them
I struggled so with the word “abortion.” If it came on the TV or someone
said the word, I would want to run out of the room. It was horrible; for
eleven years, I felt like God would never use me. I was a horrible teen
for aborting my baby at fifteen years old. I felt like God was up in the sky
with His big baseball bat just waiting for me. I thought when I had my
first son that He would surely take him from me for payback of my sin. I
didn't know how much Jesus loved me, or about His grace and mercy.
He never pays back like this; he loved my son too!
As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our
transgressions from us.
Wow! Do you know freeing it was to know that God didn’t hold a baseball
bat up there in heaven; that He loved me and forgot my sins as far as the
East is from the West.
How far is that? He removed my sins too! That is amazing! He loves me
and He loves you too!
Another area I had to go through was being placed in a nursery with lots
of babies. My skin would crawl; I just couldn’t do it. I knew God needed
to break down my walls of protection. I was separated from my mother
when I was six weeks old; my grandmother raised me, while my mother
was in a hospital for post partum for a lengthy time. So the first year of
my life was with my grandmother. Which I know now, I suffered with
attachment disorder as well. So how did God do this? I told my boss, “I
don’t like to do this, but I need to press through. In a matter of a few
days, my walls of protection came down; I learned to love strangers’
babies now. God was opening up my heart to more of Him and less of
Feel free to email me with your side effects I would love to hear from